WILLIAM (FB status): Remember those beatboxing flute players everyone was blown away by a year or three ago? How many of you are still listening to them on a regular basis? Just asking…
BRAIN: I was so blown away by this beatboxing flute player
BRAIN: who has ever said that?!
SAMIR: I think it was that summer when everyone was listening to Ukranian punk
BRAIN: tch.
BRAIN: Ukrainian punk
BRAIN: SO OVER
Author: brain
Just Don’t Eat the Curry
BRAIN: this “Choffy” is just roasted cacao ground up and put in a bag
JYU: wouldn’t that just be “chocolate” then? Like historical chocolate?
BRAIN: right! We were joking it’s two spices short of Aztec Chocolate
BRAIN: it needs chili pepper and cinnamon
JYU: Why would you have a savory drink? Or a drink with chili in it?
BRAIN: it expands your blood vessels and helps keep you cool
JYU: I always thought you put spicy things in food to disguise that they had spoiled
BRIAN: no man, in south indian food there’s tons of chili pepper
JYU: yeah, because they are eating spoiled food
BRIAN: I’m not eating at your house
Oh, Moamar!
JEFF: Moamar Gadaffi apparently had a HUGE crush on Condi, to the point of being stalking
JEFF: he sent her lots of expensive gifts of watches, wines, and autographed pictures of himself
JEFF: and he talked about her in terms like, “She is a proud and wild lioness, a true daughter of Africa”
MATT: Oh, Moamar.
MATT: I think that should be a sitcom, by the way. He’d do something silly, and then somebody would go, “Oh, Moamar!”
MATT: And then he’d look at the camera and shrug, and there would be a music cue.
MATT: Something Benny Hill-ish.
BRAIN: “this sitcom is about a wacky north african dictator and his love for a straight-laced fascistic american political aide”
MATT: I think we have a mid-season replacement, at least.
Spock’s Milkshake
PICTURE OF SPOCK
My dairy-based frozen confection creates a focal point to which young males of the species are drawn. You are correct: it is far superior to yours. I could attempt to educate you on the finer points of this subject, but it would require monetary recompense on your part.
OJ: they could’ve done better
OJ: dairy-based frozen could be ice cream, froyo, or sorbet
BRAIN: not specific enough you think?
OJ: yah! it’s spock, it should be specific
BRAIN: totally
BRAIN: we must aim for Maximum Buzzkill!
OJ: also, the focal point is not mentioned to be in the neighborhood of a local domicile
OJ: but not within the domicile
BRAIN: you made me choke on my after-lunch sugar-alternative
OJ: accomplishment of mission objectives has been achieved.
BRAIN: indeed
Samantha Brick
BRAIN: I know exactly how she feels.
Samantha Brick on the downsides to looking pretty: ‘Why women hate me for being beautiful’
RICHELE: It’s why I hate you, fo sho.
MALLIKA: Brian – I hate you because you’re beautiful.
KIRBY: Is there an emoticon for a squinty-eyed “I’m judging you” look?
The article has the marks of a master troll… many people are pretty annoyed with her article. Was she just trollin’ ?!?
…However she had an actual point which is more legitimate and therefore less outrageous/funny. I think her delivery is just real bad… on the other hand if she wasn’t such a doofus I would never have heard of her article.
It’s like “Wag The Dog” over here. Memes are complicated!
Remember the three-faced frog
RAYTRACE: fearsome
BRAIN: grotesque
RAYTRACE: i wonder which brain controls which leg
RAYTRACE: does it eat through all htree heads?
RAYTRACE: it’d make neurophysiology so much easier
RAYTRACE: three brains in one animal!
DY: it is kind of cute in a star trek way
BRAIN: yuck!
BRAIN: does it have 3 brains? makes you thinkg
BRAIN: “let’s go get coffee”
BRAIN: “ok”
BRAIN: “no”
BRAIN: “dammit we never can agree on anything!”
BRAIN: Tom insists it’s an elaborate hoax
DY: i think it is cute
BRAIN: like a real-life pokemon
BRAIN: TriFrog! I choose you!
BRAIN: Trifrog is a water-type pokemon
Fruits of Brazil
I found this note which I never transcribed – it’s a bunch of notes about fruit I was tasting in Brazil.
Fruit notes
Green things- bitter, never got “Ripe”- very sour! Soft flesh and skin like a plum
yellow things- very sour, vaguely apple flavored, soft flesh, harder skin that is not edible
sapote? not jenipapo! – potato–like mottled brown papery skin- inside looks like a overripe plum (brown and yellow), with a consistency of a firm plum. Tastes slightly figgy.
Mangosteen – a hard dark purple rind, similar on the outside to a pomagranite. Very thick rind- almost like a thing particle board. On the inside, a white segemented fruit, slimy like the inside of a loquat. Most segments have no seeds, but some have a single seed which fills >50% of the segment. Very sweet and slightly tart.
Net melon – tastes like a milder honeydew. Extremely juicy.
Passion fruit “maracujua” – larger than little purple passionfruit, hard yellow outside, like a huge old lemon- inside, past a lemony white pith, is a gelatinous mass of seeds with pulp. Very sour!
jenipapo – grey. smells like a pu-erh- earthy. pulp is the hard consistency of a walnut fruit, or a soft leather. Inedible.
cuja “cashew apple” – astringent.
I dreamt of Martin Scorsese
I had a funny dream last night –
I dreamt that my wife discovered she was distantly related to Martin Scorsese – so some of her younger cousins and I got invited to “Cousin Marty’s” place.
Scorsese in person was fun but sort of a control freak… he met us at his place but then put us on a bus he had rented with a driver, just three of us on a full-sized bus.
The bus took us to a place up the coast where there was sort of an abandoned water temple… the washed-out trail was full of backpacking hippies making some kind of pilgrimage
So we get there, and the place is a ruin. I realize I’ve seen it in a clip from one of “Marty’s” more famous movies, which I’m embarrassed to not have seen.
When we return he shows us a list of house rules. One of them is essentially not to use text messages from inside the house without him reading the messages. When I am back with my family I work out an elaborate cipher to use when I’m back at his place. I teach my mom to use web-based WWI-era codes.
I also quiz the younger cousins to make sure they aren’t going to be a pain on the trip back; I’m unconvinced and refuse to bring them back.
That is about all I can remember!
SAMIR: sounds like easy rider
BRAIN: I HAVE seen Easy Rider real recently
Things not to say in an interview
When Jack Sarfatti was 13 years old, he began receiving phone calls from a strange metallic voice that told him he would someday become part of an elite group of scientists exploring uncharted territory. Those calls, which he believes may have come from a computer on a spacecraft, proved a seminal influence on his life and led him to pursue a career that combined mainstream physics with an enduring interest in UFOs and the far-out reaches of science.
Tide thefts and consensus reality
BRAIN: Tide thefts
BRAIN: what I love about this is how non-drug trade people have no idea
what the deal is… we can only speculate!
STEPHEN: I could be mistaken, but I don’t think the site with the Tide
article is being entirely truthful.
STEPHEN: (as in, I think it’s a little more The Onion than The BBC)
BRAIN: Thieves rolling Tide detergent out of US stores
STEPHEN: !
BRAIN: tide thefts – Google Search
BRAIN: truth is stranger than fiction
BRAIN: snopes hasn’t determined if it’s a widespread hoax or not
STEPHEN: It’s not unheard of for mainstream media to mistakenly pick up humour/hoaxes … but it does sound like maybe I was mistaken and, as you say … truth is stranger than fiction,
STEPHEN: You cannot make this shit up. Or, if someone did … damn, they’re good.
BRAIN: the Orbo guys are still around I think
STEPHEN: The bit where it said “… where Tide is known as “liquid gold” among officers.” was where I really started to think “Onion!”
BRAIN: I had a similar reaction to the passion gap thing
CLU: man, this explains those dirty looks I would get when I went to get detergent before I switched to All….
ACH: Police say reports of nationwide spike in Tide thefts doesn’t wash (Fox News)
ACH: How many anectdotes does it take to make data?
PIRATEQUEEN: I found several news articles that are months old that support the Tide story
MATT: Maybe this is some sort of weird viral ad campaign for Tide.
BRAIN: genius