My dairy-based frozen confection creates a focal point to which young males of the species are drawn. You are correct: it is far superior to yours. I could attempt to educate you on the finer points of this subject, but it would require monetary recompense on your part.

OJ: they could’ve done better
OJ: dairy-based frozen could be ice cream, froyo, or sorbet
BRAIN: not specific enough you think?
OJ: yah! it’s spock, it should be specific
BRAIN: totally
BRAIN: we must aim for Maximum Buzzkill!
OJ: also, the focal point is not mentioned to be in the neighborhood of a local domicile
OJ: but not within the domicile
BRAIN: you made me choke on my after-lunch sugar-alternative
OJ: accomplishment of mission objectives has been achieved.
BRAIN: indeed

Samantha Brick on the downsides to looking pretty: ‘Why women hate me for being beautiful’

RICHELE: It’s why I hate you, fo sho.
MALLIKA: Brian – I hate you because you’re beautiful.
KIRBY: Is there an emoticon for a squinty-eyed “I’m judging you” look?

The article has the marks of a master troll… many people are pretty annoyed with her article. Was she just trollin’ ?!?

…However she had an actual point which is more legitimate and therefore less outrageous/funny. I think her delivery is just real bad… on the other hand if she wasn’t such a doofus I would never have heard of her article.

It’s like “Wag The Dog” over here. Memes are complicated!

Fruit notes

Green things- bitter, never got “Ripe”- very sour! Soft flesh and skin like a plum

yellow things- very sour, vaguely apple flavored, soft flesh, harder skin that is not edible

sapote? not jenipapo! – potato–like mottled brown papery skin- inside looks like a overripe plum (brown and yellow), with a consistency of a firm plum. Tastes slightly figgy.

Mangosteen – a hard dark purple rind, similar on the outside to a pomagranite. Very thick rind- almost like a thing particle board. On the inside, a white segemented fruit, slimy like the inside of a loquat. Most segments have no seeds, but some have a single seed which fills >50% of the segment. Very sweet and slightly tart.

Net melon – tastes like a milder honeydew. Extremely juicy.

Passion fruit “maracujua” – larger than little purple passionfruit, hard yellow outside, like a huge old lemon- inside, past a lemony white pith, is a gelatinous mass of seeds with pulp. Very sour!

jenipapo – grey. smells like a pu-erh- earthy. pulp is the hard consistency of a walnut fruit, or a soft leather. Inedible.

cuja “cashew apple” – astringent.

I dreamt that my wife discovered she was distantly related to Martin Scorsese – so some of her younger cousins and I got invited to “Cousin Marty’s” place.

Scorsese in person was fun but sort of a control freak… he met us at his place but then put us on a bus he had rented with a driver, just three of us on a full-sized bus.

The bus took us to a place up the coast where there was sort of an abandoned water temple… the washed-out trail was full of backpacking hippies making some kind of pilgrimage

So we get there, and the place is a ruin. I realize I’ve seen it in a clip from one of “Marty’s” more famous movies, which I’m embarrassed to not have seen.

When we return he shows us a list of house rules. One of them is essentially not to use text messages from inside the house without him reading the messages. When I am back with my family I work out an elaborate cipher to use when I’m back at his place. I teach my mom to use web-based WWI-era codes.

I also quiz the younger cousins to make sure they aren’t going to be a pain on the trip back; I’m unconvinced and refuse to bring them back.

That is about all I can remember!

SAMIR: sounds like easy rider
BRAIN: I HAVE seen Easy Rider real recently

When Jack Sarfatti was 13 years old, he began receiving phone calls from a strange metallic voice that told him he would someday become part of an elite group of scientists exploring uncharted territory. Those calls, which he believes may have come from a computer on a spacecraft, proved a seminal influence on his life and led him to pursue a career that combined mainstream physics with an enduring interest in UFOs and the far-out reaches of science.